11.29.2005
Not Gonna Dignify It With A ResponseSpecial Election Day here in Spartanburg. Democrat Harold Mitchell and Republican Joe Burgess face off in a race for a recently vacated state house seat. Burgess wasn't always a Republican, though.
Reports the
Herald Journal:
"Burgess used to be a Democrat, but changed parties last year after being moved by Democratic Sen. Zell Miller's speech at the Republican National Convention."
Again, not gonna dignify that one with a response. Or, you could say I'm too scared Zell will breathe fire on me and kill me instantly.
11.28.2005
Ricky Williams's Facial HairSomebody make it stop!
I just think if the NBA is gonna institute a dress code, then then NFL should think about putting some restrictions on facial hair.
11.27.2005
Sunday, Bloody SundayThis marks week number six my
Sunday Times has failed to arrive on the doorstep. I don't think I've gotten my paper delivered more than two weeks in a row ever since moving here, actually. I tried to cancel but instead they just "credited my account". Don't count me in your circulation numbers if your paper doesn't circulate my way.
Another Week, Another Week's MenTed KoppelThe O Face GuyLittle Engaged RobotJason Witten
Chuck Norris
And We Can't Forget Some Inspiration"You are under arrest for robbery, assault on a peace officer and for making me miss the rodeo!"
-Walker, Texas Ranger
11.23.2005
24 Hours in AppalachiaSpent the night in Asheville, after mining Cold Mountain (of
Cold Mountain fame) for snow. Couldn't find any, but stayed to ramble about road conditions for the morning and noon shows.
Anyway, Happy Thanksgiving to all! Look out for The Bird Flu...
Related postsNotes from Maggie Valley, NCThis Year, Kicking It In G-S-PThe Opposite of Snowed In
11.22.2005
Rush Limbaugh DayThomas here, guest-blogging for E. I am soon to be her west coast correspondent, reporting from Seattle.
I was listening to Rush Limbaugh today. Why you ask? Because his lack of reasoning ability makes me feel superior. I like to think that with my fancy college degrees I am way more intelligent than all the people in the heartland.
Today Rush was complaining about John Murtha being a weak-kneed liberal. Murtha only served 37 years in the Marines.
A little reminder - Rush served in the military as many days as Bill Clinton did - zero.
11.20.2005
O MyDid anyone else notice that George's brother on Grey's Anatomy is also the "
O Face Guy" from
Office Space? "You know: Oh. Oh."
Men of the Week Strikes BackBack from a cruise-induced hiatus. The men:Jon Corzine (belated)
Talan TorrieroEliot SpitzerChris Daly, San Francisco supervisor trying to bring down Bill O'Reilly
Inspiration from Film or Television"What can you expect when you're on top? You know? It's like Napoleon. When he was the king, you know, people were just constantly trying to conquer him, you know, in the Roman Empire. So, it's history repeating itself all over again."
-Boogie Nights, written by Paul Thomas Anderson
11.19.2005
We Share Some DNA, But The Similarities Stop There
Here's my little brother, in his latest facebook photo. I have so many questions about this, like what is he staring at? What's going on with the hair? And the visor? And the shoulder muscles?
11.16.2005
The Eyelid Twitch, Day TwoAround eleven in the morning yesterday, my left bottom eyelid started twitching ever so slightly, but oh so annoyingly. It has not stopped. At first I thought I was just blinking strangely and losing neural control over that particular eyelid. Now it's definitely an outright twitch. I have tried:
a.) Staring at it in a mirror
b.) Holding it down during an episode of
The West Wing on Bravoc.) Complaining about it to Stiles, who said, "Just punch yourself in the face!"
11.13.2005
I'm going to go ahead and clear up any confusion you might have about the above picture. It's not a screen grab from a movie. I took the picture myself, last night, from the house next door to a KKK rally. I honestly didn't believe these still went on. In fact, it's truly sad these people are filled with such hate.
The Klansmen in their cloaks and hoods chanted some random stuff about God and country and marched around the cross before torching it. As it burned they spread out their arms like Kate Winslet in
Titanic, but I'm pretty sure they didn't say "Jack! I'm flyyyying."
11.11.2005
Getting to Know YouPreface: My blogger friend Thomas killed his blog last week. As a result, I fell into a deep malaise. But things are looking better - he will soon appear occasionally on 67 Degrees as our "West Coast Correspondent". Before he begins blogging, he takes on my questions...What do you want to be when you grow up, besides the best West Coast Correspondent ever?I wanted to own a baseball card store.
Who is your dream date, besides Maureen Dowd of the NY Times?Probably Michelle Pfeiffer or Sigourney Weaver. I am in my "older woman" stage.
What is a deal breaker on a date?Probably not being nice to the waiter. Or smoking.
Who is the hottest US Senator not counting Barack Obama?Susan Collins of Maine
Who are the top three people you would punch in the face if you ran into
them on the street?Tom DeLay, James Dobson, Sean Hannity
In Sports Night episode 34 "The Cut Man Cometh", Issac wants to be called "The Hammer" but Dan says you can't give yourself a nickname. If you COULD have yourself a nickname, what would it be, and why?Wit.
Speaking of hammers, you were born and bred in Houston. Seriously - what is
Tom DeLay's problem?He thinks being "religious" will absolve him of anything he will do. Ever.
So we've learned that Thomas won't be donating to Focus on the Family, has a serious Mrs. Robinson complex and would prefer it if you didn't smoke. If you have questions for Thomas, leave a comment or email me and we'll probe further.
11.09.2005
Such a Sticky SituationGaffney Police officers spent their day at the
Peachtree Inn, where maids cleaning a room discovered blood spattered on the walls, and blood soaking the sheets, pillows and mattress. Smelled like a crime scene, so they called in a forensics team. By then
we reporters were sniffing around, too.
Later, two tests performed on the substance came out negative for human blood.
They took the bag of bloody sheets to a separate room to examine it again. That's when an officer smelled something entirely different than a crime scene.
In fact, the officer smelled something kind of familiar.
Something kind of sweet.
Something kind of... saucy.
That's right. All the blood soaking the sheets and spattered on the walls was not blood at all. No, no. It was CHOCOLATE SYRUP. Sounds like someone was gettin' saucy with the saucy, if you know what I mean...
re: The Punch in the StomachRemember Thomas, from two posts ago? You know, the one who ruthlessly slaughtered his blog and tossed his readers into a dark abyss of despair? Well, he's back! (Sort of.)
Thomas came up with an idea to become 67 Degrees' first West Coast Correspondent. (He will soon move to Seattle.) I will give him a questionnaire like the ones they make actors do for Cosmo so that you can get to know him.
11.06.2005
re: West Wing Winging ItI was too lazy to do this myself, but our friends over at TV squad are
live blogging the live episode.
8:58: Now, if NBC wants to take this whole "real debate" thing all the way, they should have Chris Matthews on MSNBC after the show, with experts and pundits talking about the debate and who won/lost!
I totally second that.
Like a Punch in the StomachI am grieving today. I learned
former MOTW Thomas has deleted
his blog, to focus his energies on some insignificant matter some people refer to as "passing the bar exam". This is about as hard on me as that summer between 7th and 8th grade when I found out my great love
Hugh Grant got with prostitute
Divine Brown for sixty bucks.
I wept then, and I weep now.
11.05.2005
The Search For My Next Arch Nemesis
Remember my nemesis? (To qualify, Esquire told us last year
we all need one.)
My nemesis is the poster child for talentless TV anchors rising to the top of the industry. The
"Greek bitch"of Dallas'
Channel 8. The woman wasting expensive airtime and slowly eroding our news values every morning from five to seven am.
Well, she's such a BAHRING nemesis now. First of all, she's just one of about a gazillion talentless hacks who get promoted* (I'm beginning to concede the war), and second, she hasn't done anything annoying lately.
I was outraged when she appeared on the cover of
Avid Golfer even though she doesn't play golf, but that was more than a year ago! Now she's just hanging around, doing her silly traffic reports, and
looking for people to write in about their commutes. BAHRING.
I was thinking of releasing my negative nemesis energy on
Ann Coulter, but it's not nice to make fun of people with psychotic problems. Going to keep pondering this one.
*Shephard Smith, et al.
11.04.2005
September 25, 1997 Was A Fateful DayOn that evening, Aaron Sorkin collaborator
Thomas Schlamme directed a LIVE episode of ER. It was a watershed night for the television empire, for it marks the night ER jumped the shark. All downhill from there, baby. (Have you SEEN the latest promos? A helicopter is going to crash INTO the hospital! How much longer until aliens invade?)
History must not teach NBC anything, for the once great West Wing will be live Sunday night, with
a presidential debate between
Matthew Santos, D-Houston, and
Sen. Arnold Vinick, R-Calif. (These are fictional characters, for any of you who are confused.)
In honor of the event, Mr. Reddy is hosting a debate watch party (yes, for a fake debate). The official invite:
You are invited to share in this exciting moment in television history. It could be the closer for the Vinick campaign, and the resurgence of the best TV program since Quantum Leap*, at last bringing a respectable portrayal of a Republican leader to prime time television. Or it could be a total flop...
Before it begins, we'll have a showing of this week's WW episode, and perhaps some clips from the last major debate (President Bartlet wiping the floor with Gov. Rob Ritchie of Florida in episode 406**).
No, he's not joking.
*Quantum Leap theme music here
**Also a fake debate
11.03.2005
Wisdom from City LeadershipSo Spartanburg Mayor Bill Barnet stopped by our office today. First words upon entering: "Why don't you guys fix this up a little bit? Maybe get yourselves a different office..."
See, local politicians AREN'T idiots!
